Asda marple cricket club Wednesday meeting .

[simonesaffron]

Wheels, of course bullying isn't ..."all about perception". It is a complex issue like most human issues. Some people are quite simply deluded, where is the perception there?

I too have had experience of dealing with allegations of bullying and it is exactly as Dave says inasmuch as  before any allegations are un/substantiated a process of natural justice and investigation has to take place. The "victim's" perception of the situation cannot just be accepted as fact. If we accepted your premise we might just as well go back to burning people who we think are witches because it is our "perception" that they are and also because they wear pointed hats and like black cats.

If it's my perception that I'm tall and slim when I'm actually short and fat then which one is true ?

Come on Wheels you're in a hole, stop digging,  and oh, apologise to Councillor Kev.   

[Victor M]

Wheels,
For a definition of bullying please see this link http://www.worksmart.org.uk/health/what_is_bullying_at_work I think you might find that Dave is correct.

[wheels]

Oh dear, oh dear.   

As it happens I do have had experience of dealing with workplace bullying, and it is not at all as wheels describes it.  If someone alleges they have been subjected to bullying, and they wish the employer to take disciplinary action, then a proper procedure has to be conducted, and the alleged bully been given a chance to explain, defend or justify their behaviour.  It's known as natural justice.  You can't just brand someone a bully simply because someone says so.  That would be positively medieval! 

Wrong as usual Dave

[Dave]

Oh dear, oh dear.   

As it happens I do have had experience of dealing with workplace bullying, and it is not at all as wheels describes it.  If someone alleges they have been subjected to bullying, and they wish the employer to take disciplinary action, then a proper procedure has to be conducted, and the alleged bully been given a chance to explain, defend or justify their behaviour.  It's known as natural justice.  You can't just brand someone a bully simply because someone says so.  That would be positively medieval! 

[wheels]

If any of you have had any experience of having to deal with work place bullying you would know that bullying is all about perception. Thus if I feel you are bullying me then you are, if I feeling your speaking to me in a racist or homophobic way then you are. It has nothing whatsoever to do with you or mine or the broadcasters view or intentions its about how you make me feel. (Obviously not me personally before some of you get confused)

So if anyone from ASDA felt they were being spoken to in a bullying/intimidatory way then they were. The rules/legislation is quite clear.

Now I did not attend the meeting but some tell me that Dowling went over the line and if thats how he made some of the public feel then he did. End of...

[Duke Fame]

Well lets hope you take the same attitude when points are firmly made here.

For someone who wasn't there wheels, you seem to have made up a story, come to your own conclusions and then passing them off as fact.

[alan@marple]

I too was at the meeting and Councillor Dowling certainly did not bully anyone. As was stated he gave quite an oratory, well prepared and delivered from his notes. MIA loved it.
In my opinion the  representative from ASDA (the younger one without a jacket on) could have made a better presentation and did seem to adopt an air of arrogance, but I put this down to youthfull exuberance, I think a Woman might have done a better job. But I am sure that ASDA will appeal and perhaps will have the best legal team to represent them.

[Victor M]

I was actually at the meeting last Wednesday and the only person who was being aggressive during his presentation was the 1st person to speak from ASDA. He hit the table repeatedly with his hand and you could tell from his tone and body language that he "had lost it" after just 30 secs. He has a lot to learn in presentation skills, it said a lot for the kind of person that ASDA employ in senior positions.

[simonesaffron]

I think that somebody is getting carried away here and jumping from A to Z and not for the first time - I think that it is you Wheels.

When my friend made the metaphoric allusion to the ASDA guy being "close to tears"etc, I took it as just that and certainly not as being literally applicable. She certainly at no stage described Councillor Kev as being a "bully" or anything that remotely resembled it. In fact that word was never mentioned - it is you and you alone who has brought it to the scene. 

I have since had other accounts of the meeting (as I said in my initial post I wasn't there) from people who were there and they all tally. The ASDA guy was asserting that there was much support for his scheme from what he called the "absent silent minority". Councillor Kev sought to contradict this view with his own speech which according to my sources was quite crushing, emphatic and even a rousing oratory.

The point is it may have been delivered in a confident,measured and assertive way but there was no hint of any bullying.

On the subject of the word "bully" it is a much bandied about word these days. If anybody is contradictory, or assertive or even loud they are often accused of being a bully for no other reason than they win the argument or make the other person feel uncomfortable. I appreciate that this is only a blog, but we should have some standards and I really do think that we should give very serious consideration before we describe people (who cannot defend themselves) in such a harmful/frivolous/untruthful way.             

[wheels]

Well lets hope you take the same attitude when points are firmly made here.

[Howard]

I see Howard so bad behaviour is ok at a public meeting where you might agree with the protesters but not here. errmmm

There was no bad behaviour, just a set of points firmly made. If you're being sent to appear at a public meeting at which there will be opposition then your employer should equip you with the skills to cope with it or substitute someone who can. If the guy from Asda was upset then he either hadn't prepared properly or wasn't capable of operating in such an environment.

[admin]

I was at the meeting. Cllr Kevin didn't bully anyone, he simply, clearly and concisely stated his position on the application with the reasons why. It was pretty emphatic.

[Duke Fame]

Duke its nothing to do with the ASDA guys reactions its the behaviour of person abusing him. Do you really want to be represented by a bully?

You mean like Gordon Brown?

I'd agree, if it's abuse. If it's firm questioning then so be it, if someone can't hande hard questions, they need to look for a different job.

I don't mind any representitive of mine make firm and informed questions. Even MP's are prone to just making popularist stupid points but in that case, i'd expect the answers to bat those away

[wheels]

I see Howard so bad behaviour is ok at a public meeting where you might agree with the protesters but not here. errmmm

[JMC]

I think the above shows why Asda supporters may be nervous of attending!